Sunday, March 11, 2007

I am seriously too old for this crap

I think that it would have been a lot easier if I had gone to law school 10 years ago. I can deal with the workload and the stress of the job hunt, but the rest of it drives me nuts. I don't think that I am a typical non-traditional student, but I still don't always fit in. I don't know about who is dating who unless I find out by accident. I don't get invited to parties very frequently. People make a whole set of assumptions about me yet I continually fight myself to not make assumptions about them.

Despite being treated like an old lady socially, I don't get any credit for having years and years of professional management experience or years of volunteer leadership experience when it comes to dealing with people on regarding classes, clubs and other stuff I do all week. They think that since they've been in law school for a year or two more than me, that I am supposed to "look up to" them somehow. That my experience outside of law school is not valuable. I don't think I act like the "traditional" non-trad. I am assertive though, and people tend to act more passive-aggressive in law school than straightforwardly assertive.

I seriously don't know what to do about any of this. I have tried listening more and talking less. I have tried just not attempting to have friends at school. I have tried to be myself. I have tried being super nice and super friendly. (That gave me a "super" headache)

Maybe I should just give up. I will go to class, and study and hang with my non-law school friends, and that will be it. No law school organizations. No attempt at friendships. Nothing.


divine angst said...

I have classmates who do that--basically, law school is their "job" and not one where they have made friends.

I think part of the problem is the mindset of those who go straight through, where every other educational experience they've had has been not just grade-level-based but also age-based. I.e., all freshmen are the same age! All seniors are the same age, and older than all freshmen. Some of them get it that law school isn't age-stratified, and some don't.

Frankly, if you have an established social circle, thank the heavens. I did not when I started law school, and had no other options but to try and make friends among my classmates. I'd say it doesn't happen overnight, either, and I was lucky to fall into a group of friends fairly early on. Find other student orgs to be involved in, if the ones you are in are full of those age-focused types.

Overthee Hill said...

For the record, I do have "friends" here, but even those who call me friend still don't treat me the same way as their 22 year old buddies. It's pretty harsh sometimes. Most of the time, I don't have time to care, but the day I made this post was a particularly bad one.

I chose to blog about this because I don't think enough of us talk about these issues.